


A Study Session with Blueberries

by bertlebear



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Bert - Freeform, Bertholdt is such a cutie sometimes, Blueberries are his favourite ok, Bruises, Cheek Kisses, Confessions, F/M, Fluff, Gift, The world is too cruel for Bert, attack on titan - Freeform, gentle giant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-31
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:07:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22046878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertlebear/pseuds/bertlebear
Summary: You are well aware of Bertholdt's crush on you, and given the many chances and time you've spent together for him to confess his feelings, you decide to show him during his birthday just how special you think he is.
Relationships: Bertolt Hoover/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 87





	A Study Session with Blueberries

“Agh!- Reiner, could you at least be a little more gentle?”

Reiner releases his hand out of shock at seeing your face twist from the sharp agony. Once he sees you bite your lip does it provoke a response out of him as his hands move back to your wrist to focus on wrapping the bandages. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have purposely done something like that to make the instructor pair you up with Bertholdt, especially at something like hand-to-hand combat.”

Shooting him a reassuring look, you move your wrist gingerly, testing the capabilities and frowning when the bandages didn’t provide much mobility. “Thanks, Reiner. But I have given him way too many chances at talking. He never seems to be very open with any subject whenever I bring it up, and today proves that I need to do something about it.”

You knew that Bertholdt was quiet most of the time and liked to stick with Reiner most of the time, only speaking when it was necessary. Surely he was like this for everyone, but you felt a different sort of tone with his voice whenever it was directed at you. He seemed excited, more at ease when you’d laugh and joke around with Reiner and him, though his feelings for you were crystal clear; you could tell from his eyes and the way he treated you throughout the day.

Reiner stood up, wiping his forehead where a couple drops of sweat gathered. You proceed to get up too, reminding yourself how tall his massive form was as your head only reached up to his shoulder. His large hand covered the roll of dressings, putting it back into the rusty drawers along with the other medical supplies as you anxiously imagined how your encounter with Bertholdt tomorrow was going to be like, the thought sending an uncomfortable nausea through your stomach.

You jumped as Reiner suddenly hummed in contemplation, eyebrows furrowed and a hand moving to scratch at his scruffy blonde hair. “I might have an idea.”

Peering up at him, you nodded eagerly as he continued. “I’ve never told anyone, but today’s his birthday. Maybe you could buy him something? When we were little, he loved blueberries and he’d always eat them whenever I came over to his house to play.”

He gave you a thoughtful smile, moving ahead of you to open the door while you shared his excitement, a slight hop in your steps upon laying a mental plan for when you would strike.

“Also…” he paused, hazel eyes flicking to your wrist and then back at your face, “I don’t think you should worry about that wrist. I’m sure it’ll heal just fine; Bertholdt isn’t one to hurt anyone seriously. Even though he is very well physically capable of doing so, he would never if it was avoidable, especially for you.”

You weren’t sure how Bertholdt could ever get along in life without such a supportive and amazing friend like Reiner. Oh, how you couldn’t want to see how he would react; mentally squirming in apprehension as you confronted him and let your arrangement fall into place of wishing him a happy birthday. “I heard he’s a bit concerned about the upcoming tests on the different behaviors of titans, so he’s most likely going to be going to the library after dinner.” 

Reiner gave you a smirk, closing the door while his footsteps fell in pace with yours down the hallway. “Perfect.”

Turning around a corner, you were met with the usual loud chatter of your comrades in the lounge, people lining up and eating meals, scattered in every nook and cranny possible. You spotted many different colours of hair; brown, black, blonde, even red, but what caught your eye in the far left side was the familiar tall figure and pale green eyes of Bertholdt. Your gazes locked, sending a strange flutter inside your stomach while you quickly turned to Reiner, trying to calm your racing heart. “I know I shouldn’t be having doubts about this, but are you sure this is a good idea?”

Reiner placed his hand on your back, giving you a little shove forward towards the stack of plates and the sickening long line-up of hungry cadets. “I’m sure, how could you back out on me now? Bertholdt needs this, trust me.”

You turned around to see his warm eyes latching onto your hesitant expression, silently encouraging you to force down your fears and move forward with the preparation. Mouth settling into a straight line, you nodded at Reiner, strangely confused with how quickly his look had captivated you into agreement.

Again thinking of how well this would go regardless, your confidence started to return, growing piece by piece. Even if by some absurd chance he truly didn’t have feelings for you, the blueberries were of course going to make him ecstatic and treasure your friendship, no matter if you two stayed as friends or got together. Blueberries were rare, and considering how tightly bonded you, Reiner, and Bertholdt were, the very worst case that could happen would be him receiving a birthday present while you pushed down whatever romantic feelings you had for him. 

Giving Reiner a light punch on his shoulder as he winked at you good-humoredly, your eyes found themselves travelling back to Bertholdt’s seat, feeling an urge to be with him upon seeing his isolation from different groups of other cadets, eating comfortably although there was an atmosphere of sorrow to it. Annie was nowhere to be seen; perhaps she was skipping to further improve on her different attack combinations of punches and kicks. 

You found the soup to smell horribly sour, Reiner seeming to return the same thoughts as your nose wrinkled and you put the serving spoon back down, moving to grab a piece of bread instead with potatoes. Approaching Bertholdt, you felt Reiner’s whisper tickle the outer shell of your ear, continuing to echo in your head throughout the entire evening. “Remember. If you need any help at all, you can always come and talk to me, okay?”

Once dinner had passed with enthusiastic conversations about training and exchanging information about each other’s events during the day, you couldn’t help but feel a twinge of anticipation when you catch up to Bertholdt, his head perking up at the sound of your voice calling his name. “Bertholdt, do you want to study together for the test on titans tomorrow? I’m kind of nervous, so it’d be nice if we could help each other out.”

Bertholdt face morphed from one of shock into a small smile. “Sure. We can go to the library since it’s quiet. Did you want to come with us, Reiner?” His eyes curiously watched the blonde as he moved away, answering in a brash tone. “You guys go on ahead, I want to check on how the bet with Eren and Jean went for who can win the food fight. I think I can ace this test no problem, Bertholdt.”

“O-okay.” You could tell the tall black-haired boy was trying his best to hide his panic, hands beginning to become sweaty at the fact that it would be just you two for the night. And on his birthday?! How could his friend do that? Even you were beginning to feel a little bad for your poor friend who seemed to be mustering every drop of courage he had to remain calm and composed in front of you.

Little did he know about the small but solid high five you two shared under the table before getting up, exchanging delighted glances all hidden away from Bertholdt; the boy was probably confused beyond comprehension now, you were sure that he was having some of his own thoughts on what happened. Trying to cover up for the tense atmosphere, you hollered after Reiner’s retreating shape with a grin. “Tell me who wins the bet tomorrow, if they can even get past doing this without Sadis noticing!”

He gave a thumb up without turning around, and left you to lead Bertholdt into the very place where everything would go down. You turned to Bertholdt, gauging his expression carefully as the both of you walked, his strides much longer than yours. He slowed down considerably for you, maybe he wanted to talk more or maybe he was just being caring so that you could travel side by side to the library. Surely you must have been overanalyzing the situation, because you were shocked at how your mouth suppressed any normal remark that would’ve happened right about now and chose to be quiet. Whether Bertholdt noticed this or not was difficult to decipher, but it didn’t matter now as you caught his gaze for the second time that day, more awkward stares surely to come after. Thankfully you were able to save yourself with a smile, to which he returned it apprehensively. You didn’t want it to be like this, it wasn’t turning out how you’d want it to so far, so you watched his soft eyes as they moved over every book in the section, one by one, immensely focused as you took in the frown that graced his features. Bertholdt was definitely going to be silent half of the time unless you decided to make the first move at a conversation, so it was up to you to fulfill what had to be done.

The only problem was how you couldn’t bring yourself to take the first step, it had never occurred to you, never truly sunk in that it was just you and a giant, nervous boy who had a helpless crush on you. 

You pinched the bridge of your nose, the idea leaving you doubly stressed and indecisive than before.

It’s the beginning of a disaster, your mind screamed as you absentmindedly reached out for a book without knowledge that it was your injured wrist, immediately flinching when the book fell out of your hands with a sharp thud on the floor. “I’m sorry-“

“Are you alright?” Came the concerned voice of what was causing you so much trouble, moving from where he was in the other isles to help you pick up the book, noticing at first glimpse the damage he had done to your wrist. His pupils grew wide, face turning a little pale from realizing what you had been hiding from him. Bertholdt planned to ask you about it, except he had absolutely no thought that it was to the extent where you had it bandaged, which made him guilty and more ashamed than ever. But you didn’t catch any of it; your pulse racing in overwhelmed pressure as you thanked him profusely, laughing it off in a playful manner. “I guess it’s been a rough day for me, so let’s just sit down and get to work.”

Not sure what to do, he nodded numbly, the books stacked firmly in his hands as he followed you to a bench with fluorescent candles burning a bright amber orange all around. There was still an hour before curfew when you had to be in your cabins, and the pair of you decided to hide behind one of the large bookshelves to have a bit of extra solitude at studying.

You had been in a rush after eating dinner, excusing yourself from the table to rush to the nearest fruit stand that was half an hour’s walk away. But it was worth the physical exertion once the farmer gave you a discount, saying that the blueberries here were the last batch and that you looked like your life had depended on it. Sure, you might have looked a little suspicious carrying a strange bag around the halls, but nobody questioned it much as they were all busy with Eren and Jean once you arrived back. Getting caught was also a potential risk, but sometimes rules were meant to be broken, right? Everything would be alright once you got to see his beautiful heart-warming smile at its core while receiving the gift, even if it would be for a short moment. You would remember this moment and carry it with you for the rest of your life; as Bertholdt’s friend you had privileges to see the other, genuinely kind, tidy and hard-working side that he had closed off so tightly. Not to mention adorable, as his voice perked up once you started asking him about the differences between normal, abnormal and intelligent titans.

Time had passed by quickly, and you started to grow fonder for Bertholdt at recognizing his varied efforts for every aspect of the military training. How he would try to study different moves at hand-to-hand combat, observe the personalities, qualities and behaviors of all the people he met, as well as give great advice with his skills in 3D maneuvering gear, although that aspect was usually reserved for just Reiner, Annie, and you. He was an amazing soldier in every way, and if you could allow the golden title; essentially perfect.

..So why was he hiding all this from other people? What made him be able to climb the ranks fastest, if he said he didn’t have much will or motivation? Why would he never try to accept compliments or draw attention to himself, even when countless comrades had praised him for his hard work? When would Bertholdt figure out, that he was your dearest role model?

You had no clue that he had a bit of knowledge prior to the military training about titans, but he only replied with, “I took more thorough notes during class, and there’s no way that all titans are the same. I told you already, right? I saw it myself. They’re all different.”

The both of you studied mostly in silence, but sooner when you realized that it was only a matter of time before you two wouldn’t stop pestering each other, Bertholdt decided to go through the unit together with you, patient but firmly making sure you understood every point and detail possible. In preparation, you two also benefitted from testing each other, asking different questions based on what you learned and laughing occasionally when one couldn’t recall the answer. Sooner or later you had checked the library to find that most of the soldiers had already filed out for the night, only one or two individuals remaining inside, intent on doing additional research or study.

“Do you think we should pack up? I think we’ve studied enough; we already got all the types and behaviors down, and don’t forget that some intelligent titans can move in the night unlike normal titans,” You giggled to yourself, relishing in the fun that you had not experienced much in the days of your cadet training, the significance and cruelty of it all hitting you into a state of constant relevance. “I feel like that might be on the test. Didn’t Sadis mentioned it way too many times? It’s almost like he was giving a hint away for what’s gonna be on the test.”

Bertholdt chuckled softly, tidying up his books and papers that were slightly worn and wrinkled from daily usage. You speculated that it could also be from the way he always sweated at the most inappropriate or unexpected times of the day. But he was able to improvise accurate reasons, often playing it off as physical exertion if it was titan-killing training or hand-to-hand combat. People may see him as Reiner’s shadow, or someone who would not succeed in life with his unapproachable aura that made him frequently uncomfortable and timid, but it was everything opposite to you. Only when you get to forge a solid and unbreakable bond as best friends would you be able to see their true colours. 

You gathered up your books and an uncontrollable urge of gratitude overflowed your mind. The small genuine smile that lifted your cheeks in the candle’s glow didn’t need to be suppressed, because your heart, mind, and entire spirit throbbed in sync with appreciation. “I’m glad I got to study with you, Bertholdt. Now I feel like my mind is sharp and ready for that test tomorrow; I honestly can’t thank you enough sometimes.” 

Your voice was like sweet honey, there would never be a moment where he didn’t want to hear it. Bertholdt nodded, scratching his chin nervously all the while he admired your smile, noting the way your eyes seemed to burn brighter around the flames, how your skin reflected as smooth, sparkling and endlessly clear. How your soft hair shone on the brink of stunning silver at the tips, and how much he wanted to run his hands through them. “Anytime, but I’m only doing what anyone else would do.”

There was a flash of dark brown at the corner of your eye, a patch of purple hue tender to the touch below his jawline, and you stopped in your tracks, fixing him in place with a worried look. There was no way, you had been so careful not to harm him, just the idea making your mind revolt in guilt and disgust. Still, you placed your uninjured hand gingerly on his cheek, tilting your head and leaning in a bit closer to inspect the painful discoloration. “Is that…..from this morning?”

Bertholdt was frozen, it was like everything in his body ceased to function, and he was oh so enraptured by how gentle your touch was, only able to stammer out an answer many heartbeats later. “This? I-it’s nothing, I’m fine. A bruise, that’s all, we get them all the time from training,” With shaky hands you found him holding your injured wrist that was over his face, eye contact seeming to make the exchange of words sincere and giving him a boost in confidence. “I care about you too, what happened to your wrist?”

A frown made its way onto your face; he couldn’t just brush it off like that and bring up your injuries as more severe! With a click of your tongue, you shook your head. “I know you too well, Bertholdt, and please listen when I say not to apologize. We both had to do what had to be done, which was fight until one of us surrendered. Injuries were bound to happen anyways. You going easy on me didn’t help, either; it doesn’t feel like a win when your opponent isn’t even trying his best.”

Bertholdt shook his hands frantically in denial, crestfallen with remorse. “I know, but I still feel terrible. It’s not that I think you’re weak or incapable; I just wanted to end it before things got bad. Of course I knew the consequences, and I promised you that I’d try my best for everything, but this time I just couldn’t. What if your wrist never heals? What if my actions changed your life forever? I would never be able to forgive myself for that.”

Your hands curled into fists, though you were surprisingly calm compared to how you felt on the inside. “But this time I’m okay. Reiner said it was just a torn ligament and that it should be back to normal in a month or so. Since the hand-to-hand combat results are decided, I can rest easy and use my right hand until then. The final exams for 3D-maneuvering gear aren’t until a couple months later.”

It took a couple of moments before Bertholdt was convinced that you were fine, his furrowed eyebrows easing under your reassuring gaze. His eyes were soothing to gaze at, a sort of pale green that reminded you of the soft grass fields that stretched endlessly across the horizons. You had never noticed this until now, but his pupils were also tinged with darker flecks of olive, adding a piercing and unique attribute in conflict to his regularly innocent and curious nature. The upset look in his gaze gradually dissipated and then changed to a sort of acceptance that he knew he could handle for now at your comfort.

Taking a deep breath, your hands settled comfortable along the bends of his elbows, unable to resist the smile that spread across your features once again. “It’s your birthday today, right?”

You heard the hitch in his breath; saw the way his eyes immediately widened to those of an owl’s. It amused you to no end, seeing him so flustered, but judging by the slightly bothered expression on his flushed face, he was demanding an answer. Not trusting his voice, he nods instead, watching you curiously as you pull out a small box-like object that was obscured by a dark purple blanket.

“Here, I bought some blueberries for you. It’s not much, but I was hoping it’d cheer you up since I don’t want you moping around, particularly on your birthday for that matter.” You handed him the basket, watching with a grin as he lifted the blanket to reveal the delicious and rare fruit, dark purple and still fresh.

“I-I don’t know what to say…” He places the blueberries back on the table before wrapping his long arms around you, squeezing you firmly against him and placing his chin on your shoulder. Your heart hammered against your ribs, the air stolen away from you at his sudden action. Bertholdt’s taut muscles could be felt from under his shirt, and your head was pressed into the crook of his neck, where you noticed sheens of sweat visible from along his collarbone. He was a gentle giant; his body encasing yours in such a comfortable way that you wanted to stay forever feeling his presence and never letting go. He murmured warmly into your ear, voice strangely husky when closer from what you usually heard. It didn’t surprise you to know that Bertholdt was growing to be a soldier now, a man that had to be independent for himself as well as others. Physically as well as mentally, he was changing drastically, way too fast for your liking, even if there were still remains of his bashful and reserved nature. “Thank you so much. Nobody’s ever done something like this for me.”

“You’re welcome anytime, Bertholdt, by no means should you take our friendship for granted.” Chuckling, you feel his arms slip from around the small of your back, the contact that electrified your nerves fading away into a sort of numb, troublesome itch.

Although the ghost of a smile still lingered on his brightened face, he hesitated, unexpectedly looking confused. “How did you know that blueberries were my favourite?”

With a playful smirk, you picked up your books, trapping them between your arm and chest while answering in a naive tone. I got some help from a guy with blond hair. He also says you have something you should tell me, but it’s not like I’m unaware of it already.”

Bertholdt would have to discuss this with Reiner later, betraying his friend like that in order to get him rejected? He had to admit the present definitely made his day, but it still did not replace the fact that his cocky, childhood companion had planned for this all along. “I’m sure Reiner was talking about someone else-“

“Could you bend down?”

Though he was taken aback, Bertholdt obeyed after seeing the impatience in your eyes, not questioning why since he trusted you after all.

There was a light brush of something under his jaw, your lips he then identified as you landed the softest kiss of all right onto his small bruise that tingled from your humid breathing. Every particle in his body flared up in tension and shock from the gesture, a heat unlike no other rising up to conquer his face. Your face relaxed and up close made his mind scream to pull away, but his heart spoke otherwise, stuck at reveling in how much beauty one person could possibly hold. He wasn’t dreaming, was he?

You smiled; it seems the embarrassment was also getting to you from initiating such a bold move on the poor boy, your cheeks burning and voice becoming considerately timid. “Does that make you feel better? I think you’re special to me, Bertholdt.” 

Now Bertholdt was beyond flustered, stammering and attempting to think of something but could not form a single coherent sentence. Instead with a quick bow, he quickly turned tails and fled the scene. “Thanks for studying with me, but I think it’s late now and I need to sleep..!!”

Your gaze followed his desperate escape from the library; it looked like he was prey being chased by you, the predator. But you made no move to pursue him, instead your mind wandered to his face mere seconds ago, flushed beet red and drops of sweat dropping down the side of his face. How adorable.

But as you were about to call it a night and leave yourself, out of the corner of your eyes were the blueberries, abandoned on the wooden table.

You sighed, a smile tugging at your lips for what seemed to be the thousandth time today. Bertholdt was in for a whole lecture tomorrow, and your heart leaped in sadistic excitement at making him squirm once you confronted him early in the morning.

That boy truly didn’t know how to get away from you, did he?

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BEST BOY! Bert, you truly didn't deserve what you got and I will make sure that he gets enough love because this world is just too cruel and I need to hug and wrap him in blankets to protect him lol. Hope you guys enjoyed, Bertholdt is one of my favourite characters, such a gentle, independent giant~ :D


End file.
